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LITERARY HEROIN (Gluttony): A Twilight Parody


Literary Heroin (Gluttony) / $2.99

BUY: B&N | Smashwords (multiple formats)

iTunes | Google Play | Print


Isobel's fanfiction dream comes true when Edwin and Jacobus materialize out of thin air. But the two hunks secretly have the hots for each other...

GENRE: Fiction (satire / parody / dark humor)

LENGTH: 22,000 words (novella)

DEDICATION: For everyone who loathes sparkly vampires--and their predecessors. For anyone who cares about arts, culture, and society.
Last but not least: for Twihards.

NOTE #1: "Gluttony is an inordinate desire to consume more than that which one requires." --

NOTE #2: This story features in Bad Romance
(7 Deadly Sins Anthology)
, and Box Set (Parodies).


* First fiction book featured on ScrewPulp (FREE as of May 2013!)
* Featured by request on Bloggerdise (2013)

* * *

WARNING!: This story is more or less horrifying or humorous. jessINK would like to apologize in advance for any offence Twilight fans might take from the caustic descriptions in Literary Heroin.

* * *

REVIEWS (emails, etc.):

". . .I'm going to go read [Literary Heroin] now. I love Twilight parodies! And thank you for [dedicating the Bad Romance anthology] to me. I am honored. Thank you!"
-- Michael K |

"Your job is to write the best you can about the things you care about. However, I thought your parody of Twilight was very funny. (I have only read the beginning so far.)"
-- Reader/Customer Email (from U.K.)

"If you are one of the people who hate Twilight, the Twihard craze, and how corporations push books down people's throats, then Jess C Scott's Literary Heroin is a hilarious catharsis that mocks the overhyped and sexist series. Scott's mockery of Twilight and even Twilight knock-off writers will have readers laughing long after they finish the book, all because it is true that there are a lot of bad books out there that somehow snag major money and acclaim. If you want to get the Twilight taste out of your mouth, then Literary Heroin will do the trick!"
-- Kristopher Miller, Author of The Maze's Amulet

"Funny as hell; awesome satirical moments."
-- Nelo's Bookshelf Reviews

"Jess C Scott smartly chooses her words to really give an electrifying effect to readers...this is a work that will instigate revolution against literary mediocrity and mundane novels. I highly recommend this to people who love books and who hate bad literature!"
-- Hail Gil (5-star review)

* * *



-- Literary Heroin excerpt featured in #VerySpecialArtists group on
deviantART (unsolicited).

-- Commercial Romance and Self-Esteem (guest post on Hail Gil's blog)

-- Saying the Unsayable (why Jess writes parodies)

* * *

EXCERPT [Literary Heroin (Gluttony)]:

Ms. Isobel Swann, the English teacher, looked at her star pupil.

"So, what did you think of Twue Wuv?" Isobel asked with a sweet smile.

"I learned that it's okay to feel the way I do: that my life has no meaning unless I have a boyfriend," gushed Stephenie, Renesmee's BFF.

Stephenie was overweight but enjoyed dressing provocatively. She thought the guys couldn't handle her. Most of them were scared off by her seductive ways and non-stop approaches towards anyone in class who owned a pair of testicles.

"A real man is like the perfect vampire-boy and all the perfect guys in Twue Wuv."

* * *

+ Longer excerpt available @ Jess's deviantART.

* * *


Be sure to also check out Jess's parody on Fifty Shades (available in parodies box set in late 2014).

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